Am i dating a loser quiz
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I can really see no reason why I should be here. Some of this has been solo and the rest has not. I think they'd be embarassed at whatever job their loser dad gad. I have been with my boyfriend for 10 months and aside from a few ups and downs, we have a happy relationship. Just like the notion winner. North are days where I just don't want to even move from my bed.
The e-mail feedback I have received on the article has been tremendous. There are more victims in the environment of the Loser than his or her partner. The loved ones want to understand the situation and ask for recommendations and guidance. Obviously, this article has created the need for sequels. I hope to publish a guide to assist Losers who want to change their life and behavior. An article addressing sons and daughters who were parented by Losers is also being planned. My goal is to follow this issue and provide help and guidance to all those involved with controlling and abusive individuals — from partners to extended victims. Introduction Very few relationships start on terms other than sweetness and politeness. Both you and the date are guarded, trying to obtain information about the other as much as possible without seeming like a police detective. Romantic relationships can be wonderful with the right person. A damaging adult partner can damage us, damage our loved ones, and even damage the way we feel about love and romance in the future. We all know to avoid people that appear insane or abusive and not select them as a dating partner. However, some individuals are better at hiding their personality and behavior abnormalities. These are characteristics that they accept simply as the way they are and not a problem or psychological difficulty. If your partner possesses even one of these features, there is risk in the relationship. If he or she hits you, twists your arm, pulls your hair, kicks you, shoves you, or breaks your personal property EVEN ONCE, drop them. Male losers often begin with behaviors that move you physically or hit the wall. Female losers often slap, kick and even punch their male partners when upset. Normal, healthy individuals require a long process to develop a relationship because there is so much at stake. Healthy individuals will wait for a long time and a lot of information before offering a commitment — not three weeks. You will also hear of violence in their life. You will see and witness this temper — throwing things, yelling, cursing, driving fast, hitting the walls, and kicking things. At first, you will be assured that they will never direct the hostility and violence at you. But they are clearly letting you know that they have that ability and capability — and that it might come your way. Later, you fear challenging or confronting them — fearing that same temper and violence will be turned in your direction. This gradual chipping away at your confidence and self-esteem allows them to treat you badly later — as though you deserved it. You will withdraw from friends and family, prompting them to become upset with you. Once you are isolated and alone, without support, their control over you can increase. The cycle starts when they are intentionally hurtful and mean. You may be verbally abused, cursed, and threatened over something minor. Suddenly, the next day they become sweet, doing all those little things they did when you started dating. You hang on, hoping each mean-then-sweet cycle is the last one. They give you the impression that you had it anger, yelling, assault coming and deserved the anger, violence, pouting, or physical display of aggression. Some call your relatives, your friends, their friends, and anyone else they can think of — telling those people to call you and tell you how much they love you. Creative losers often create so much social pressure that the victim agrees to go back to the bad relationship rather than continue under the social pressure. Their reaction is emotionally intense, a behavior they use to keep you an emotional prisoner. If you go back to them, you actually fear a worse reaction if you threaten to leave again making you a prisoner and they later frequently recall the incident to you as further evidence of what a bad person you are. Remember, if your prize dog jumps the fence and escapes, when you get him back you build a higher fence. If you have an individual activity, they demand that they accompany you, making you feel miserable during the entire activity. The idea behind this is to prevent you from having fun or interests other than those which they totally control. If you speak to a member of the opposite sex, you receive twenty questions about how you know them. They will notice the type of mud on your car, question why you shop certain places, and question why you called a friend, why the friend called you, and so forth. They may begin to tell you what to wear, what to listen to in music, and how to behave in public. Eventually, they tell you that you cannot talk to certain friends or acquaintances, go certain places, or talk about certain issues in public. Our material is not intended as a substitute for direct consultation with a qualified mental health professional.
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